100 Love Letters I'll Never Send (...situations to get hurt) (C) 2018


Many weeks ago I was convinced that Carmelita didn't want me anymore. I went to the Coral restaurant. Was lucky enough at the time to have a one night stand with the waitress. Now, I took Carmelita to the Coral restuarant. Damn, I totally forgot about the waitress.
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"Hey," Britney, the object of what made me love Carmelita more, greeted us.

My mind totally took it there: Britney says, "Good to see you again."
"Just what the hell do you mean?!" Carmelita begins to snap.
"OH THIS MUST BE THE OTHER WOMAN."
"I'M HIS WOMAN, BITCH!" Carmelita aggressively lunges forward and slaps Britney. I take pleasure in being so wanted.

Back to reality,
"Hey," Carmelita responds.
"Can I get ya'll drinks?"
"Yes, we'll have a couple diet cokes."
"Okay. Sure thing." Then Britney starts telling us about tonight's special dinner. It's like she had never met me before. It is silly; I feel so unattractive. I was just an object that night. I should feel guilty. The girl of my dreams is with me now.

Why should I feel guilty? After all, she did probably cheat on me back when she was in Virginia.

 My sponsor's words come back to haunt me, "You'll never trust her because you'll project your infidelity on her." 

"What do you want, love?" I ask. Seconds later I notice the weak whiny tone in my voice.
"Hmm. I really missed the coast shrimp," Carmelita says with a look of wanting me in. Damn I love that look.

Five minutes pass.

"You know I think, know that our love is so strong nothing could separate us," after I say that she waves my hair back and pecs me on the lips.

"Okay. Oops. Sorry," Britney's come back. 
"It's okay." Carmelita replies.
"We'll get the broiled shrimp platter."
"Right on. Good choice." Britney jots it down.

Seconds later, "I have to go to the bathroom," Carmelita disappears to the bathroom for fifteen minutes. 

My suspicions again; what if Carmelita talked with Britney.

We eat our dinner in silence. On the drive we don't say anything for many minutes. 

"I feel sick," Carmelita says.

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