"The Coin" part 3 from "Inside Your Shadow" (C) 2025 “It is by forgetting that one finds.”

“Those words haunted you, Ricky?” Ricky replied by rolling his eyes. Yet now Thomas Moon noticed those body language expressions less and less. Was it because Thomas knew it was a defense mechanism. “Ricky, I understand that you’re working with the Chaplain more now.” “Well, I wouldn’t do it if it were a white chaplain.” “Is it important to you really?” “Of course it is.” “Why?” “My grandfather was killed by a cracker.” “You ever seen that movie, ‘Malcolm X?’ The one by Spike Lee?” “You actually going to tell me about it?!” Ricky screamed. Then Thomas turned his head to the guard. “It’s about time for me to leave anyway.” “Well, in one of the final scenes a white lady was telling him about Jesus. And even before that it showed Malcom going to Mecca and all races worshiped ‘a God of their own understanding.' God loves you Ricky. And he’s always got a good plan for you."

The boy was scared. Really didn’t belong there. Does anyone really belong there? Ricky’s eyes were following him. He felt pity. Why should he even care? The yard of the jail was big. The iron of the free weight plates, the bench, dip rack; everything was rusty. The lost boy was a walking teardrop. His head was down. He looked at his feet with every footstep. Ricky watched as he shook with fear of the loudness of the iron bumping and the yelling of the inmates. Something that the Silly Man Moon (Thomas Moon) said was haunting Ricky. Haunting him to do the right thing. Ricky didn’t even notice that long minute until he was a few feet away and mumbled to himself, “Weak white boy.” There was a group of inmates playing cards. One of them yelled, “Hey white boy, come here!” A couple others said, “Watch this.” “This is the time in life that someone loses their innocence,” Ricky thought to himself. The boy pretended not to hear them. Ricky knew the play because he had seen it in jail many times. The one yelling ‘white boy’ was going to give him some dope to give to someone else. “I’ll be your friend,” he added. While his friends continued, “Watch this.” Silly Man Moon told him that part in the St. Francess of The Sissi prayer, “It is by forgetting that one finds.” Ricky put a comforting hand on the shoulder of Tear Drop, “Come with me.”

“Sometimes you just have to let something you don’t see guide you,”

Moon said that like the things he said so many times before. Yet this time Ricky was openminded, “Yea, I saw my mom the other day. She told me that she was still praying for me,” Ricky said.  Moon just smiled, then lowered his head down and continued reading Ricky’s file. Moon followed with the repeated question that he asked often at their sessions, “What happened that night outside the hotel?” Ricky sighed, then explained again:

 Ricky’s pants pockets were heavier than usual. He felt something was going to happen, He thought about just staying at home. His boss would probably find out. That definitely would not be good. He remembered the last guy that was made an example. “Come on man, I’m good for it,” Lil Key said with two of his bosses boys on him side by side. "Yea," they came up on Key when he was on his front porch at midnight smoking a cigarette. They came from all sides,

 “You have it?” The boss asked. “Well, I ugh,” Key replied. The boss nodded his head. His hench men forced Key to put his hands on the table, “Ricky,” the boss commanded as he looked over at a hammer on the floor. Ricky picked up the hammer. Walked to the table, picked it up and slammed the hammer on Key’s hand, “Two days. Next time, I cut your hand off.” 

I was walking up the street. Going to this hotel. Police cars squealed down the street. Nothing strange about that. Then I heard that dog coming. Strange how I was hearing more than usual among all the hood sounds. Like a dog barking. The dog was black. You know Blacks and dogs don’t mix. Damn thing was…” “Damn thing was more like a blessing thing,” Moon interrupted him. “Right. Blessed thing was toying with me. Stayed at a steady pace behind me for just enough time for me to hear the cops pull up to the hotel. I looked back and it was like that black dog was smiling at me. Then I heard some gunshots. And the black dog disappeared. Went back to my mother’s house. She was crying. She said she had been praying for me. If it weren’t for that dog…” “A Power Greater than yourself,” Moon interrupted him again.

“Well ‘doG’ spelled backwards is ‘God.’”