100 Love Letters I'll Never Send (“You could have been anyone to me.”) (C) 2017

It is action time. I'm either going to do it or NOT! Am I going to seek my ex-girlfriend? 


This is the end part of this saga.

Note: play this song while reading this for full entertainment purpose.
“What do you want?”

In those couple of seconds as I wait to reply I think:
Some songs, sounds, sights, and touch get lost in time. I remember the pain we put each other through just to make our time together exciting. Like arguing just to have passionate makeup. After a while; the arguing was more than the makeup.

This may be my only opportunity I’ll have to make amends.
THAT IS A LIE I AM TELLING MYSELF. Yea, you go through your life lying. Then something happens and you are forced to face the truth…and I got this feeling, knot in my stomach, this could be one of those moments.

“Sir?” I look up at the waitress. I NEED TO LEAVE. She is in her early twenties.
“Uh…” I dig in my pocket. Pull out the crumpled five-dollar bill. I could write my phone number on it and have the waitress take it to her.
“No thank you, mam.” I leave the crumpled five-dollar bill on the table and walk out of the restaurant.

Walk to my car. Thunder claps and the sky falls on me. I walk slowly. For I think I need to have this sketched in my memory. I don’t know how I am going to do this. I heard somewhere that sometimes the only purpose for one relationship is to get us ready for the next relationship.

I get in my car. Go through my cds. I find Neil Young. I put it in my cd player and listen to the track ‘Hurricane.’ I had this on cassette years ago. I remember listening to his song Hurricane while we were apart during one of our ‘we’re really not together but we’re going to see each other still’ times.  

Neil Young spoke the line to me again, “I am just a dreamer, but you are just a dream. You could have been anyone to me.”

I drive away from you, “Good by love.” I cry. “I’ll find love. Now I can truly love.”


How much time have I spent getting ready for some event, thing in my life? Has this been an investment in time? Or a waste of time? …and when I got, had, that great thing, event in my life that I wanted did I make the most of it? Did I take it for granted? Did I waste it? What of the time after I got this thing, event? Or when I lost it? When I gave it away? When I lost, gave away this great thing, event did I waste time in self-pity?

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