100 Love Letters I'll Never Send (Self pity meets Infidelity ) (c) 2017

I went back to the old spots where Carmelita and I went. Told myself I went to these places to remember how strong our love is. The truth was, is, I was preparing myself for when this all goes bad.

Tonight, I am at The Coral. Waiting for the waitress,  I look over the gulf coast beaches at the beautiful sun set. I keep trying  to focus on the sun. My attention is drawn to the couples holding hands.  Then back to my cellphone on the table. It's been too long. Should I call her again to only get no answer. I have all sorts of scenarios going through my mind.

Her with a new man. Her parents forbidding her to see me. She probably lied and went back to her husband who lives in Virginia. She just didn't want to tell me the truth. She wants to keep me on the sidelines as her back up plan if and when it goes wrong with him. Oh what the hell am I thinking. She's probably helping her parents get settled. It's only been four days now.

Then at the speed of desperation I dial her number. No answer, "Hey baby, I'm at our favorite restaurant watching the sun set and thinking about how beautiful you are. And how great my life is because I met you." A tear streams down my cheek after I leave the message on her voice mail.

I wipe away the tear.

"______, how are you doing?" She was a waitress now. Her smile was ear to ear. Britney Davis never gave me much attention in high school. Not that I blamed her. She was smoking hot. And still is. Now she is greeting me with a tone in her voice so inviting. Naw-that's probably just me. Waitresses are supposed to be nice.
Play it cool with this don't totally embarrass yourself.

"I'm good. How have you been?"

"I'm in a graduate studies for sports medicine. It's good to see you. I've been working here for months and haven't seen anybody from high school..." I listen intently for the next two minutes, wondering why she is opening up to me. Why did she find it necessary to tell me she was in graduate studies?

"Oh dear me," I just went on a tangent. Have you decided what you'll have tonight?"

I want to tell her,

 "Baby, I want you tonight," she moans as I lick around her ear lobe as I unstrap her bra...

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